Manna

The Biblical concept of “manna” is becoming more and more real to me.  It is introduced in Exodus 16, just after the Israelites have been freed from captivity in Egypt. Manna is the “bread from heaven” that God rains down each morning to provide for the Israelites as they are on the road to the promised land and traveling through the desert. My favorite part of this story is why the Lord begins to provide the manna, “I have heard the grumbling of the Israelites.” (16:12). Of course they were grumbling… I mean God had just freed them from their enslavement to the Egyptians, but it isn’t it human nature to find something the next day to grumble about? (Wow, that pretty much describes me!)  Anyways, the manna was only rained down in the morning and no matter how much the Israelites gathered it was always just enough for the day-never too much, never too little. Apparently God wasn’t into preservatives because if the Israelites chose to disobey God’s orders and keep the manna over night it would be moldy and full of maggots the next day.  The design of manna was for the Israelites to be fully dependent on God each day and as the Lord declared to Moses, “to know that I am the Lord your God.” 

Well I can’t say that I have bread on the ground each morning, but I do have an incredible “pekara” or bakery across the street from my apartment that bakes fresh bread… and truly desiring to integrate into Bosnian culture I find myself there every few days. But in a more metaphorical sense, I do see the manna of God rain down exactly when I need it.  You see in Bosnia my entire perspective of time and schedule are turned upside down– having a day planner is pretty much a joke. Yet this frees people up to be spontaneous and truly live in the moment. I know that relatively to Americans that I do thrive in the spontaneity of life, but here I am probably viewed as incredibly scheduled and uptight because the Bosnian mentality is definitely an adjustment, even for me! And as I take in the newness of the culture, language, customs, etc… and go through the emotional highs and lows of missing my old life… I often feel physically fatigued and spiritually empty. Yet just when I think that I am at the end of my capacity, God rains down manna in the form of…. a successful interaction in Bosnian at the market (meaning I actually understood and hopefully spoke some Bosnian), random skype conversation with my dear friends from home, meeting a new friend for coffee, getting a SMS (or text) from an old Bosnian friend, generous teammates that let me borrow their computer (until my gets fixed, still in the process)… right when I need it, not before or after, God graces me with this delicious and satisfying manna.

Now of course I grumble because I want to hoard my manna so I can plan out my meals, so I can know advance that I will be fed and feel good. And every time I try it is the same result– bread that is repulsive and could never satisfy.  Yet I am learning through the way God works in this culture that when I hold tightly to a schedule or plans that I cheapen my faith and I cheapen my trust in God as my provider and helper. A difficult lesson and one that frankly, I struggle with a lot. But I know that as I begin to loose my grasp on this false sense of control that I will experience a fullness of life that I never imagined before. Just keep praying for me to be faithful to growing in that trust